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Self-Care is Keeping it Cool, Even if He's Fly

27 has been the age of wisdom and knowledge for me. A huge part of my elevation has been self-awareness. I’ve never been so comfortable in my own skin— from the hair on my head to the arch in my feet.

I’m having fun learning my likes and dislikes, especially in my relationships. And although I’m all game’d up, I’m a sucker for protective vibes. Perhaps because I, myself, am protective? Hmm.

Anyway, as I’m learning to embrace all of me, I realized a lil some some about myself when I connected with a certain energy— a whole lotta protective, playa shyt almost had me trippin. Almost.

Growth is understanding that just because I like errrything, doesn't mean I need to macro dose it. At least, that's what is has been for me. I very much give,

"If i like it, give it all to me."

And let me keep it. And have fun with it. And love it. And treat it with care.... until I get bored. And, this has worked terribly for me. LMAO.

My spirit enjoys experiencing people from the inside out and recently I felt super unfamiliarly connected, yet so comforted by someone. The vibe was protection and wisdom meets love, but only if you can find it in plain sight. Quite interesting, like a trivia you believe you know the answers to but don't. Challenging to the mind but delicate to the soul. Almost too soothing, as if the energy is supposed to be there and you need to know why. Like, nigga why are you so imperfectly perfect for me, right NOW?

How can someone that mirrors the pages in my journals be so close and so far at the same time? I have been doing the work with God and aligning to my desires by showing up as the woman I know I am, attracting love by showing love is the biggest thing.

I hopped out of the bed, grabbed a white leather journal from my bookshelf that I used to write in, and started reading my entries. This man was exactly who I manifested, hair skin, family oriented, gangsta, knowledgable, wise, MASCULINE...No wonder the energy felt familiar.

It was almost like his calm and loving energy was sent to protect me. That's how refreshing he is. And all of my experience was happening from the inside out, my spirit yearned this connection waaaaaay more than my mind did. WAY more. My mind knew better than to dive in.

I picked up another journal and read more. The more spiritual pages caught my attention, the pages that I talked to God on. I realized that I had not prayed to ask God about my friendhsip with this person. How could I think I was invested in something or someone before tapping into spirit? Skipping a conversation with spirit will ensure a self-sabotage. Anywho, A few hours later, I got a sign that, perhaps, it me who was supposed to provide protection and sense of faith to this person?

The way we met was very unique, sort of fateful. (I'll share that in a future article). There are extreme differences about our styles of living but we both saw a glimpse of the bigger picture and how we could benefit from knowing one another. I held on to the bigger picture and wanted to share eveything God was showing me everyday, but I learned every message can't be revealed. Some obeidience requires a simple understandng or one sentence, if you MUST. As a writer, this is hard for me, especially because protective energies make sharing feel like second nature. I already have a hard time being vulnerable with others. So, when I felt comfy, I wanted to tell all, literally. Ha!

Self-care got me like, He's cool, I'm fly, everything is all good. But, I know that when God reveals things about people you care about and want in your life, listen to him, even if its my own self. He is my creator and knows me very well. There is no rush to greatness. The best things in life are to be experienced, even if only for a short time. There is beauty in limited editions as much as in longevity. But the most beautiful thing is the journey of attracting what is for us. We are'n alway supposed to know what is to come next. It's alight to relax.

Long story long, Ol boy is just fine and all my type but God told me to be cool and chill the fuck out, it's not time yet. And that's my message to you.


Shutup, Shabetti

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